On Labor Day, I left my doctor’s office and hopped in my car to drive home. My cell phone rang, and I saw it was my mom calling. I answered with my usual cheery, “Hello-o.” Mom’s hitched breathing came through the phone. “What’s wrong?” I demanded, as adrenaline surged from my overworked adrenal gland. “I…
I have experienced the sandwich generation – facing challenges I could have never imagined. This is an update to the original article published in 2016. I was my dad’s favorite. I don’t think my brothers will argue with me. He was hard on them, easy on me. That’s my girl is a phrase I heard…
“My mom/dad is driving me crazy! She gets upset over the tiniest thing. She blames me when anything upsets her schedule.” Sound familiar? As a caregiver, you may have said the same thing on more than one occasion. I know I have. If you’re caring for an elderly parent, it’s important to remember they need routine. You may…
I had the privilege of talking with Dr. Freda Crews last spring about my book, The Caregiving Season. It was especially poignant for her, as she helped care for her aging parents before their deaths. How have you faced your changing role while caring for your parents? Dr. Freda V. Crews, D. Min., Ph.D., is…
The Fear Behind the Fear My friend Greg’s mom, Alene, and I discussed dying. It’s something she thinks about, now that she’s in her eighth decade. “I’m not so much afraid about eternity. I guess I’m scared about the actual event of dying. Will it hurt? Will I struggle to breathe or have pain?” She…
In my father’s house are many mansions. If it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. John 14:12 “I’m afraid to die.” I’ve heard this comment from more than one older person. And all are professing Christians. What is going on? Christians have an abiding belief…
Aging and isolation, helping elders cope with seclusion when they start losing loved ones. I met Alene when she lived with her son, Greg and his wife. She is another elderly woman who struggled with loss and loneliness, but her story is different. When Alene became too frail for Greg and his wife to provide…
As we look to a brand new year, it brings to mind new beginnings. A fresh start. Maybe do things differently this year. Here are some resolutions I’ve made to make 2017 better than 2016 in my role as caregiver for my ninety-three-year-old mother: Give more grace. I need to remind myself that she’s 93,…
A Guest Post By Dawn Justice Please understand, When I call and check on my loved one each day, It is not because I do not trust your care for her. It is because for the last nineteen years, My mom and I have either seen each other, And or spoken to each other, Every…
At a conference I attended, a speaker used a Hawaiian word I’d never heard before: kuleana. It means a responsibility, but it’s more than a duty or task. It also carries a connotation of privilege. I wondered if I could apply this to caring for my mother. Could I adjust my perspective, and view this…
