A guest post from Ada Gerard, gotoyourcorners.blogspot.com/ Sitting in the living room at Gary’s Memory Care center, I overhear some hilarious conversations. The residents talk with each other, and neither of them know what the other is talking about. For example: One female resident picked up her purse to go to her room for the…
When you’re in the position of caring for your parent, it’s easy to revert to being a child again, especially if your relationship was never healthy to begin with. It can be difficult to create a boundary as an adult if no boundaries have previously existed. How do we draw that boundary line? Consider how…
I was my dad’s favorite. I don’t think my brothers will argue with me. He was hard on them, easy on me. That’s my girl is a phrase I heard often. He wasn’t given to physical affection. I never remember him saying, “I love you.” But that’s my girl was the same thing. My father’s…
“What time do you leave for work in the morning?” It’s 7:30 at night, and my mom has called to ask me a seemingly innocuous question. “Usually around 8:00 or so.” My hand grips the phone, waiting for the sucker punch. “Oh,” she says, with a sigh. The silence lengthens. I’m determined to wait her…
Aging Parents, Caring for the elderly “My mom/dad is driving me crazy! She gets upset over the tiniest thing. She blames me when anything upsets her schedule.” Sound familiar? As a caregiver, you may have said the same thing on more than one occasion. I know I have. If you’re caring for an elderly parent, it’s important to…
“EEK!” My husband, Mike, ran into the bedroom. “What happened? Do I need to kill a spider?” “NO,” I wailed. I stared at my reflection in the mirror, pinching the skin of my upper arm. “I have chicken skin.” I turned to show him. “Honey, you’re still as beautiful to me as the…
Why are you a caregiver? Did you choose your role? Did you weigh carefully the pros and cons, then decide based upon a rational, thoughtful process? Maybe you made a list of reasons why you should care for your elderly parent. Did a measure of guilt guide your choice? Most caregivers are either thrust into…
My mother gave me her ring. She can’t wear it anymore. Her once slender fingers have become swollen with arthritis. Four perfectly matched diamonds are mounted in a row on a gold band. I always thought it was her wedding ring because she’s worn it for as long as I can remember. She recently told…
Have you ever ignored someone speaking to you? Perhaps she asked you to do something you didn’t want to do (this is especially pervasive in the teen years). Sometimes I pretend I can’t hear my husband when he asks me for the seventh time how to find a document on the computer. He admits to…
This is a guest post from Ada, whose husband has dementia. There are many feelings associated with losing a loved one to dementia. He is still here physically and mentally, there is a person there, but not necessarily my Gary. It is some other form of a man. He doesn’t think like him, nor act like…
