Several years ago, our family gathered for the traditional Christmas dinner. We were at the home of my brother and sister-in-law. An argument ensued over a proposed expansion of a nearby Catholic Church. My dad, who was in a wheelchair, started complaining about being cold. My nephew, who has autism, started muttering loudly. I remember…
A Guest Post By Dawn Justice Please understand, When I call and check on my loved one each day, It is not because I do not trust your care for her. It is because for the last nineteen years, My mom and I have either seen each other, And or spoken to each other, Every…
At a conference I attended, a speaker used a Hawaiian word I’d never heard before: kuleana. It means a responsibility, but it’s more than a duty or task. It also carries a connotation of privilege. I wondered if I could apply this to caring for my mother. Could I adjust my perspective, and view this…
Have you ever ignored someone speaking to you? Perhaps she asked you to do something you didn’t want to do (this is especially pervasive in the teen years). Sometimes I pretend I can’t hear my husband when he asks me for the seventh time how to find a document on the computer. He admits to…
If you’re caring for an elderly parent, it’s likely you’ll be tired of the physical and mental energy needed by your aging loved one. It’s normal to be tired. But if you don’t take time to rest, you may suffer from compassion fatigue, also known as burnout. Symptoms of Compassion Fatigue Excessive blaming Bottled up…
Winter brings short days, inclement weather, and bleak landscapes. Plants die, dropping their withered leaves on barren ground. Sometimes our souls become as stark as leafless trees, or like branches weighted with heavy snow. Have you ever wished for a respite from the daily tasks of caring for an elderly parent? I know that the…
Summer is when nature turns up the heat. Here in the Sacramento Valley, we grow some of the world’s best food. It wouldn’t be possible without the long, hot, summer days. In the caregiving season, the heat is turned up as well. We’re hit with the stark reality that life is changing, and we better…
Autumn colors, leaves falling, daylight savings; these are signs the season has changed from the lazy days of summer. There are signs of the changes in the caregiving season as well. When my father’s health began to decline, I often wondered if aliens had abducted him and replaced him with an old, feeble man. He’d…
