Maria cared for my dad when he needed more help than my mom, Mike, and I could give. She was a nursing student with a huge heart in a tiny body. Fast forward eight years. Maria was getting married and our entire family was to attend the wedding. It’s all my mom talked about for…
Hospice services support patients and their caregivers near end-of-life. Hospice is not a “place” – it is a set of specialized services to help patients and families cope with a terminal illness. There is a lot of information out there about hospice, we hope this helps as a stepping stone as you journey through your…
Have you ever ignored someone speaking to you? Perhaps she asked you to do something you didn’t want to do (this is especially pervasive in the teen years). Sometimes I pretend I can’t hear my husband when he asks me for the seventh time how to find a document on the computer. He admits to…
A Guest Post By Dawn Justice Please understand, When I call and check on my loved one each day, It is not because I do not trust your care for her. It is because for the last nineteen years, My mom and I have either seen each other, And or spoken to each other, Every…
At a conference I attended, a speaker used a Hawaiian word I’d never heard before: kuleana. It means a responsibility, but it’s more than a duty or task. It also carries a connotation of privilege. I wondered if I could apply this to caring for my mother. Could I adjust my perspective, and view this…
Like you, I’m a caregiver. My 92-year-old mother is in fair health, yet her macular degeneration has robbed her of most of her vision. She relies on me to provide dinner every day, pay her bills, pick up prescriptions, and take her to endless doctor appointments. My struggle is seeing my mother as more than an…
Winter brings short days, inclement weather, and bleak landscapes. Plants die, dropping their withered leaves on barren ground. Sometimes our souls become as stark as leafless trees, or like branches weighted with heavy snow. Have you ever wished for a respite from the daily tasks of caring for an elderly parent? I know that the…
Summer is when nature turns up the heat. Here in the Sacramento Valley, we grow some of the world’s best food. It wouldn’t be possible without the long, hot, summer days. In the caregiving season, the heat is turned up as well. We’re hit with the stark reality that life is changing, and we better…
Autumn colors, leaves falling, daylight savings; these are signs the season has changed from the lazy days of summer. There are signs of the changes in the caregiving season as well. When my father’s health began to decline, I often wondered if aliens had abducted him and replaced him with an old, feeble man. He’d…
In the spring of the caregiving season, denial is our companion. Changes happen so slowly that we don’t realize it until we take look at our loved ones with fresh eyes. It hurts to see them as they’ve become. No longer our invincible heroes, they’re now gray-haired and a little stooped over. They get tired…
