Kuleana and Caregiving

At a conference I attended, a speaker used a Hawaiian word I’d never heard before: kuleana. It means a responsibility, but it’s more than a duty or task. It also carries a connotation of privilege. I wondered if I could apply this to caring for my mother. Could I adjust my perspective, and view this…

Are You a Caregiver?

  Caregiving can be a thankless, exhausting thing to do. Or it can be rewarding and fulfilling. Sometimes it’s both. There is hope. I’ve written a book called “The Caregiving Season: Finding Grace to Honor Your Aging Parent.” My prayer as you read is that you’ll find hope and grace, as I have, in my…

When Your Caregiving World Collides with Life

When you work full time and also have responsibility for your aging parent, sometimes the two worlds collide. Work pressures suck your emotional energy until you feel as dry as a shed snake skin. It’s a monumental task to dredge up enough strength to deal with the demands of caregiving. All you want to do…

Finding a New Normal – Caregiving from Afar

This is a guest post from Ada Gerard, whose husband has FTD, a form of dementia. Her blog is gotoyourcornersandcomeoutloving.BlogSpot.com. Other than when he or I went on business trips, backpacking or visiting family, Gary and I were rarely apart for long periods of time. We always came home to each other. In 30 years,…

Changing Positions on the Team

A guest post from Ada Gerard, gotoyourcorners.blogspot.com/ Sitting in the living room at Gary’s Memory Care center, I overhear some hilarious conversations.  The residents talk with each other, and neither of them know what the other is talking about. For example: One female resident picked up her purse to go to her room for the…

manipulated caregiver

The Manipulated Caregiver

 “What time do you leave for work in the morning?” It’s 7:30 at night, and my mom has called to ask me a seemingly innocuous question. “Usually around 8:00 or so.” My hand grips the phone, waiting for the sucker punch. “Oh,” she says, with a sigh. The silence lengthens. I’m determined to wait her…

Why Are You a Caregiver?

Why are you a caregiver? Did you choose your role? Did you weigh carefully the pros and cons, then decide based upon a rational, thoughtful process? Maybe you made a list of reasons why you should care for your elderly parent. Did a measure of guilt guide your choice? Most caregivers are either thrust into…

Give yourself a break – Caregivers need care too!

I recently returned from a long weekend, across the southern California to Rosarito Beach, Mexico. It was a much-needed trip away from the day to day routine of working and caregiving. I spent a lot of time thinking, while staring at the endless waves crashing onto the shore. My thoughts turned to you, caregivers who…

National Caregivers Day Friday Feb 19

National Caregivers Day is observed annually on the third Friday in February. Honor those selfless and caring people who pour our their lives for our loved ones. How you can show your appreciation: Give them a gift card for a personal treat, a massage, manicure, or movie tickets Buy a card, expressing your thanks for…