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What are your plans for Christmas and New Year’s? Do they include a house-bound parent, spouse, or child? Do you dream of going away for the holidays, but can’t because of caregiving responsibilities?

My mother’s birthday is Christmas Eve. She’ll be ninety-three this year. Mom expects a big family dinner on her birthday. How can we disappoint her, when this could be her last?

On the other hand, I can’t remember the last time my husband and I were able to go away for Christmas. We’d love to take a cruise to someplace tropical. Or visit our daughter and grandkids. Or spend Christmas with his side of the family.

Sigh.

Do you feel the same? Holidays are especially difficult when you are in the midst of caregiving. Here are some things I’ve done to help me deal with the resentment of being homebound for the holidays:

  • Remember that the caregiving season will pass. Make the most of the remaining time with your loved one
  • Focus on the true meaning of Christmas: giving, family, togetherness, and the birth of Jesus
  • Do something nice for yourself. Treat yourself to a mani/pedi/massage
  • Involve your loved one in Holiday preparations, like decorating the tree or baking special treats
  • Don’t overcommit! The holidays are especially stressful, do don’t take on more than you can handle

What do you do when you’re homebound for the holidays?

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Jane Daly is the author of two books, Because of Grace (2015) and The Caregiving Season (2016). She can be reached through her website www.janeSdaly.com. She is also the treasurer of Inspire Christian Writers and West Coast Christian Writers.

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@queenjanedaly